Bits of Saturday

Train conversation 1 : Son: “What’s your book about?” Dad: “About a Man with five wives.” Son:”And that is a PG?!”

3 Replies my text message that I had just purchased a coffee for 90p at the trainstation:

– ” Bargain, that wouldn’t even get you a hot water in London.”
-” I’m worried your coffee might be rancid…”
– ” Can you see a horse and cart somewhere too?”

Driving through the country lanes: “This is so pretty…”

“Scones or Tarte Tatin?” “I don’t know.” “You choose” “Ok erhm Scones” “Ok.” “Wait but we don’t have cream.” “Oh and I forgot the jam.” “Tarte Tatin.” “Yes, Tarte Tatin.”

After already having made cheesecake, meringues, indian potato pie, chickenskewers, salmon bagels, roast veg- and – mozzarella stuffed loaves, vol-a-vents, drumsticks, three kinds of dip: “Do you think I should just cut up some veg?”

“I only go through one pack of these a week. Really not that bad you know” “For a smoker.”

“They’ve just texted: they’ll be here in 20min!”

An hour and a half later: “Oh my god, I’m so glad to see you! I so need the toilet! I’m so glad to see you!” “Maybe be use the toilet first.” Sprints upstairs shouting ” I AM SO GLAD TO SEE YOU!”

“Give me the baby” x 126435

“Sorry, I just remembered I don’t like gingerbeer.”

“I’m worried my son will know you as Auntie Lezza…” ” I’m not a lesbian, I’m just married to one.”

*Whisper, whisper in the kitchen* Door opens: “Oh sorry, did I just interu…WHAT BOY!?”

To baby:”Are you using my boobs as a ledge?”

“She just texted: there is a two hour delay.” “Tell her the food will be gone” “She says to save her a voillavent.”

“I want to try all three desserts.” ” Good me too, just cut them smaller then we can share.” Yeah me too, but I’m not sharing.”

Again two hours later: “Yay! There she is!” ” Stupid lorry, but I made it!” ” Yay! I’m sorry we got to go…” Booo…

On our way out: “Wait! We have to plan Christmas!”

Trainconversation 2: Man on phone: (on redundancy and work opportunity) “Yes, but I don’t think I’d want to go to Hong Kong.(…) No.(…) I know, but I don’t think the dog would like it.”

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